Deciding that a person who wronged you is unworthy of your forgiveness may seem like an act of appropriate justice, and a reasonable one at that, but the person who suffers the most in the end is you. What actually results from a refusal to forgive is an automatic self-appointment as their judge and the disempowering establishment of yourself as a victim. The person guilty of the offense doesn’t get away with anything when you forgive them and let go, for the fear or pain that inspired them to wrong you will continue to affect their life in many ways long after you have forgiven them.
Forgiving them will release you from the prison of negative emotions that are associated with the person, empower you to continue trusting others in spite of what you experienced, allow you to learn the valuable lessons from the experience without anger, fear, or pain clouding your perception, and inspire the deep understanding of what led to the experience that will prevent it from happening again. Even if you decide that you no longer want that person in your life, forgiveness will allow you to move on from the experience with a clear mind and an open heart.
By: Michael Verdun